It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever e-book, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is offered for pre-order! Here!
An precise e-book that it is possible for you to to carry in your arms. Or, should you favor my dulcet tones, hearken to together with your ears. You’ve beloved my revealing life updates, through the years, and also you’ve diligently learn by my farcical tales of woe (bear in mind after I virtually by accident penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the way in which again to 2001, after I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my regulation diploma to grow to be an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.
You can name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my recollections and the experiences I had as a trend mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very critical. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my e-book within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.
And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embrace a narrative about by accident happening a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir sometimes have a chapter known as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle by my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Sporting Knickers? No it could not.
So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set prior to now, however don’t make the error of considering that any painful soul-searching went into this e-book. Let’s not get the improper finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it obtained to the insufferable bits: this can be a rip-roaring riot of a journey by a decade of the inconceivable situations and stunning occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and ceaselessly ridiculous.
Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel
OK, there are poignant moments. After all there are. The truth is I used to be particularly informed, after I obtained the e-book deal, that I needed to embrace the bits that may create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently turning into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or virtually falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the troublesome bits in addition to the entire components that may doubtlessly have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.
However largely this can be a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods wherein I didn’t grow to be a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my persona defects and my spectacular potential to draw chaos and catastrophe in virtually any scenario.
You possibly can pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I believe it’s a reasonably protected wager that you just’ll like it. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so should you solely ever click on on one hyperlink I publish then please make it this one. I’ll be eternally in your debt.
Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel here
I’ll be again with extra posts in regards to the e-book and in regards to the means of writing it as a result of it has actually been the most effective, most satisfying factor I’ve ever accomplished in my grownup life. In the event you’ve adopted me for some time you then’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really blissful accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve a superb and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a e-book deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.